Personal Growth – Is Your Life Not Too Bad?

A couple of months ago, in the course of one of my Personal Development Workshops, I pointed out that, most of the time, if you ask someone how they’re doing, the answer you’ll get is “not too bad”! On the second day of the workshop, one of the group told us that, on his way to the venue, he’d been listening to the radio. Half a dozen people had ‘phoned in for a quiz and, in every case, when the host asked the caller how they were this morning, their reply was “not too bad” – every single caller! I often believed that that type of down-in-the-mouth response was an Irish thing – but I’ve since found out that that’s not so. The French reply that they’re ‘pas mal’, the English respond in much the same way. And even my American clients tell me that, when they say that they’re great, they’re simply trying to convince themselves!

A superficial scan at seventy years of research in psychology will tell you that not so bad is about as good as it gets! Normal people, to quote the acclaimed spiritualist Anthony deMello, sleepwalk their way through life never realizing that, in order to live life to the full, all they’d have to do is wake up! Unfortunately, the normal mind goes through life on auto-pilot – the research confirms that, using our psychological faculty of automaticity, we pay almost no attention to anything that’s going on. And, in paying no attention to our day as it unfolds, we completely miss the opportunities of life that are right in front of our noses.

So wake up – if you’re feeling not too bad today, then that’s simply not good enough! Why would you go through life in a comfort zone that has you, in fact, not uncomfortable enough for you to do pull yourself together and change your life? Do you have to experience a disaster or rock-bottom to wake up? All the evidence suggests that that is the case. The personal development author, Ekhart Tolle, had to suffer something like a total breakdown, ended up destitute on a park bench, before it dawned on him that he should wake up!

Don’t sink so low. Don’t let short-change yourself. Don’t let life pass you by while you’re complaining about how horrible your job is, while you get hassled over money, while you get stressed out by the peaks and troughs of what you call life. You feel the way you feel because you’ve made things that way. And only you can change your life – you can transform it. It’s as easy as waking up.

So, what does this waking up involve? Focus on, pay attention to reality, not the stuff that’s going through your head and making your life routine, mundane and unsatisfying. Open your eyes, see the reality in front of you. Come to your senses, smell the roses. God gave you five senses – isn’t it time that you used them?

Personal Development : Want Nothing – Prefer To Have It All

A long-standing client once asked if I was happy. “I certainly am” I replied “100 percent happy!” Her reaction? “Oh, that’s very sad!” But, happiness is to be found within (where else would you expect to find it?) and just because I’m happy doesn’t mean that I don’t want to achieve more, that I don’t want more out of life. I said “want” but, in truth, what I mean is “prefer”. You see, generally speaking, we haven’t got a clue as to what we really want. And although a self-styled personal development “guru” recently told me that that is why most people are unhappy, how could normal peopleknow what their heart really desires, when all the other normal people around them are judging their happiness in terms of how they measure up to all the other normal people?

Indeed, some people who single-mindedly knew exactly what they wanted are some of history’s worst nightmares. Adolf Hitler knew what he wanted – in the end it was good for neither him nor anyone else. Pol Pot was single-minded in the pursuit of his goals as was Josef Stalin. These are not the type of people we should aspire to be! You should want for nothing – but prefer to have it all. Indeed, even if all hell is breaking out around you at this moment, if you pause for reflection you will discover an eternal truth – that all is well in this moment, you have everything you need for the perfect life, here in this now. Therefore, the single-mindedness you need is a commitment and determination to live life to the full in the present moment, to engross yourself in now, to invest more and more of your energy into the present moment.

Quantum physics proves that if you invest more of your energy in the present moment, universal energy will respond to your investment. It works for people like Nelson Mandela just as much as it worked for Adolf Hitler. Energy in – energy out. And neuro-psychology also proves that paying attention to the present moment brings about peace of mind. If these are scientific facts, then you need to make absolutely sure that you know what you want – because it could be the worst thing in the world for you and others. Remember the saying“be careful what you wish for”!

That’s my reason for saying that you should want for nothing. You should have preferences to which you are neither attached nor which distract you from the here and now. When you prefer, you point yourself in the right direction but don’t rope you in to a destination to which, if you don’t arrive, you will be unhappy. Preferences are an inner compass. Prefer what’s best for you. Neither you nor I know what’s best for us but, having that preference as our goal in life is the best way to make certain that your mind doesn’t dwell on what you don’t have at this present moment.

And it is the present moment which is most importance. It is where you are right now. It is the only place in which you can do your best, be at your most effective. Scientific fact states that it is the only time and place there is. It is the time and place in which universe energy will respond to your heart’s desires – if you could only stop wanting and start living. So, focus on the here and now. Come to your senses – you have five of them, use them to engross yourself in this moment’s reality – and experience how it will change your life.